Straight anti-gays find me particularly immoral because I can choose and still chose a woman.

Most, however, are hopelessly confused about what bisexuality means in the first place. Many get their ideas from the porn industry where it means having threesomes, others insist that it means having at least 2 concurrent relationships. Others still believe that we are attracted to men one year and suddenly switch to craving women the next. People have stated that CA’s support for bisexuals shows the complete moral bankruptcy of the organisation.

It’s a real battle and I so wish that everyone started to understand bisexuality better.
Because I strongly believe that all those ex-gays who successfully changed are intrinsically capable of change – just like bisexual people can fall in love with people from either sex.
If we really managed to educate gay and straight that bisexual is to all intent and purposes a third orientation and that bisexuals never change either – we just remain true to our orientation whoever we love- we could make a major contribution towards eradicating this dangerous and damaging ex-gay movement. This is particularly important now that they’re all talking about “fluidity” as supposed evidence that change is possible.

I deal on a regular basis with those who have been spat out of this process for failing to live up to those standards. Many of them are truly broken people and far too many become so bitter that they turn away from their faith. I hear stories that make me weep – literally. I lie awake at night crying because of some of the things people tell me. The harm caused last for decades. Some never recover properly.

If those who believe like those hard evangelicals truly understood what they’re doing, they’d be spending their lives on their knees begging for forgiveness. If they genuinely realised how much damage they cause, they could not live with themselves.

I just wish these people would live their own rigid morals but stop trying to impose them on everyone else! But they genuinely do not know what they’re doing.

And the fact that no-one has used any of the criteria to campaign against any current bishop – gay or straight, is ample evidence that this has nothing to do with “teaching” or “focus of unity”. Otherwise why would the criteria be so selectively applied to one person?

Neither you nor I are on the Crown Nominations Committee, so hard evidence is impossible for either of us to come by.

But can you say, hand on heart, that all of these criteria are being applied to every bishop in the land? That those to whom “teaching” matters will now seek to remove the bishops of Buckingham and Salisbury from their posts? That these bishops are still a true focus of unity for the evangelical parishes in their dioceses?

We are all capable of relationships & indeed it is widely accepted that people function better with a partner supporting them – how so much more so of a priest, or bishop, male or female, gay, straight or bisexual. It is the quality of love that we should be concerned about.

Once you have an individual – who has been cornered into giving a response on any matter – they have to respond & it that response is a lie – then they have compromised their integrity. If we cannot have clergy / bishops openly being able to speak of a loved one – there is something heinously wrong!

The moment you start attributing to me beliefs that I don’t hold, you lose the argument Jonathan. Why does this always have to come down to accusing people of self-loathing? Can’t you play the argument, not the man?

In other words, evidence your claim.

A Church has a right to determine its boundaries. It is clearly homophobic and has determined these boundaries. So do the honest thing and get out.

I thought you and I were discussing the guidelines.
Admittedly, I assumed that you support the guidelines, but it makes no difference if you don’t.

What counts is that they exist and that they are being used against Jeffrey John and against him only.

And it’s born out by the fact that of all the gay bishops and potential bishops and of people supporting all kinds of teaching, the only one who isn’t a bishop is Jeffrey John.
How strange!

If you personally believe in something kinder, I should be very happy.

Strike out the “unrepentantly gay” and you’re getting close. At least, unlike Erika, you do me the courtesy of trying to accurately reflect my position rather than assuming a stance and then attacking straw men.

Don’t like the “troll” stuff though. I think that’s beneath you.

No, that’s not true. Why don’t you try asking me what I actually believe instead of assuming you know and then raising up all kinds of straw men on the basis of your judgementalism.

The Church into which I was baptised, confirmed and ordained (by a gay man) was a closeted place but it had life, creativity, love and generosity. The Church you want to create is rule-bound, mean spirited, heartless, loveless and a foul place for gay people.

You can troll on posting the same old same old, and I’ll approve your posts because there’s a place for you in the discussion and in the Church. There’s also a place in the Church for me, unrepentantly gay and unrepentantly civilly-partnered. The Church is being changed and will continue to change from an institution obsessed by hostility to gay people to a place where LGB&T people are welcomed, loved, sanctified and blessed.